Have I been reading too much into the meaning of “Self Improvement”? and could my angle of approach, have had a potentially negative impact rather than a positive?
Let me make myself a bit clearer.
The word “Self Improvement” seems to indicate that there is something wrong with me. That I have to improve areas of me and my life. Now there are many areas that I would like to change in my life, but I think, if I approach it from the angle of improving it seems to add some kind of pressure onto it and maybe that is why I so rarely complete some of the stuff I start. Also, if I contantly think about having to improve my life, am I instead reaffirming that there is something wrong with my life and who I am? I used to always think that in order for me to find happiness, I would have to make dramatic changes in all areas – financially, emotinally, romantically, carreer, status etc. What an enormous pressure to put on oneself!
I am beginning to realise, and more importantly believe, that I can choose happiness at any point! So far the easiest way for me to achive this has been down to finding things to be grateful for, finding more ways to love and respect myself and writing my journal and this blog.
Another thing I have been questioning for such a long time is why the success rate of the “self help” “self improvement” stuff out there is so low (for me at least). Now I have no statistical data to back up this statement, I am just going by my experience and lack of results. There is a very good chance that it is purely down to how I approached the material.
However, for the purpose of this, lets assume that I am right. Is it possible that if you digested all the self help material out there (assuming that would be humanly possible) you would never experience what the material promises you? I have questioned this numerous times before and then yesterday, during a moment of frustration and despair of feeling stuck, I read this article on Journey of the Soul and what an eyeopener! Please have a read of it as the rest of this may make more sense.
What I have come to realise, is that I have learned something from all of the material I have ever gone through. Sometimes very very little, sometimes a lot more, but never exactly what it promised on the package. And quite often, after a little while, I was back to the old ways.
I could be completely wrong in my thinking here but I think it is time to try a different approach. A more simple and light hearted approach!
I think that gratitude and love for myself is a good starting point, knowing that, I am absolutely fine exactly as I am and do not need to improve in anyway, however, whenever I choose to change any aspect of my life I will find a way that works for me.
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Journey of the Soul