Journey of Life

the place formerly known as control your destiny

Word Salad

QuestionsThe following was written the other evening. The strange thing is, I have no idea where the words came from. Although I was the one typing on the keyboard, I did not control the direction. The words simply appeared.

I emailed it to a friend who kindly told me what this experience may mean, which has given me some further food for thought.

What’s wrong?

I know I somehow chose to tread this path but why?

Who am I trying to punish? Who am I really punishing?

Why did I choose this path instead of the path of joy and happiness?

What am I trying to prove?

What is my end game?

Is there answers to all of my questions?

Do I really want to hear the answers?

Am I ready?

Is this what’s in store for me?

The question remains;

What’s wrong?

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16 responses to “Word Salad

  1. Brynn August 16, 2009 at 5:49 pm

    Mmmm, quite interesting. Seems to me your ego is realizing that you no longer need it as much as you used to, and it is fighting to get you back. Stay in touch with your true self, your spirit, as much as possible.
    We already know all the answers, we just have to be willing to accept them.
    Just my humble opinion.
    According to my reading, all you have to do is ask the holy spirit to guide you, and then be willing to be guided.

    • J August 25, 2009 at 8:25 pm

      I think you are right. I feel like there has been some kind of battle going on for a while. I will have to find my true self before I can stay in touch with it, but for the first time in quite a while I feel I am going in the right direction.
      Your humble opinion is always welcome and very valuable to me.

  2. shiona August 16, 2009 at 6:14 pm

    J, this very much resembles a technique I used to practice when I was fighting my eating disorder. I would sit down and ask my inner voice to speak to me and write down the answers. It might sound rather bizarre, but the answers did come after all.
    What you have posted here sounds exactly like the questions I used to ask.
    I hope this will help you understand your true self.
    I also want to thank you for reminding me of this technique, I had forgotten it. I think I need to go back to it because in the chaos of my everyday routines, I seem to neglect the wisdom of my inner voice.

    With all my love

    • J August 25, 2009 at 8:29 pm

      It does not sound bizarre at all. In fact, when I write my journal I tend to have conversations with myself, which often kind of switches off my conscious mind, meaning that I often don’t feel I am controlling the direction of what I write.

      With love and gratitude

  3. viv66 August 16, 2009 at 7:16 pm

    Because I find that I and my inner voice argue a lot I once made myself a Talking Stick so that while it was in one hand I could talk and when in the other my inner voice, my soul voice could speak.
    Trouble is, I put the Talking Stick somewhere and can’t remember where…..

    • J August 25, 2009 at 8:34 pm

      I am glad that I am not the only who has experienced this. I have never heard of the talking stick before. When we finally meet, I will help you look for it!
      I really appreciate your email about this. It made it a lot clearer and less spooky for me. Thank you..

  4. Robert G. Longpré August 17, 2009 at 1:32 am

    Could this be “active imagination” where one lets the unconscious or the sub-conscious, have a voice?

    The voice asks: “Why did I choose this path instead of the path of joy and happiness?” Well, perhaps the path of joy and happiness was an illusion, something the unconscious knew. Authentic life, a life of meaning is not one that just “happens.” It is a life that is won by triumphing through adversity. Any hero/heroine in any story/myth/fable/tale suffers in order to be worthy of the prize.

    • J August 25, 2009 at 8:46 pm

      Yes it definitely could be a case of allowing the sub-conscious to have a voice.

      I have been wondering about the question about choosing a different path to the one of joy and happiness. When I am in the middle of some adversity or in a challenging situation I keep telling myself that there has to be a better or easier way. Then when things calm down and I reflect, I realize that had I not experienced this challenge or adversity, I wouldn’t have learned the lesson it presented me with. I also agree that a life where all desires are delivered with no effort is a life with little or no meaning, I just sometimes forget this when I am in the middle challenging situation.

  5. tobeme August 18, 2009 at 10:05 pm

    Most of what I write does not come from me, yet flows through me. I believe the words that flowed through you are asking questions that you already know the answers to. Yes, you are ready, open and receive.

    • J August 25, 2009 at 8:50 pm

      Thank you Mark,

      I know I already know the answers but I don’t think I was ready to receive, at least until a while after I posted it.

  6. Retired Eagle August 18, 2009 at 10:52 pm

    tobeme – I agree that these words are not from the conscious self, the “me” as you call it. However, they are from a deeper aspect of your “self” that is mostly unconscious. Listen to the words. They don’t speak of some “other,” but of a fuller you, a holistic you.

  7. Love August 23, 2009 at 1:58 pm

    ” … who kindly told me what this experience may mean”

    I´m just curious, what this experience may mean?

    Well not curious, I find it interesting.

    So if you you want to share …

    • J August 25, 2009 at 8:55 pm

      What this experience may mean is what I have been trying to uncover in my latest 2 posts and I suspect more will follow.

      Thank you for your interest.
      Do you have a blog too? If so, I’d like to visit.

      • Love August 26, 2009 at 6:38 pm

        No, I don´t have any :-(. But I´d love it. I´ll work on it and I will let you know as soon as it is here, in the Seen.

  8. Dev August 24, 2009 at 9:56 am

    Quite intriguing…you inner self seems to be retaliating with the action you have decided to taken in your past.
    This does happen a lot to all of us…we try to question our actions and our decision. But that is how life is…
    it questions your answers and answers your questions. 🙂

  9. J August 25, 2009 at 8:59 pm

    Hi Dev

    “it questions your answers and answers your questions.” I love that phrase!

    I think my inner self is trying to find a way out of hibernation and my ego is trying to keep this from happening..

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