Journey of Life

the place formerly known as control your destiny

A recovering thinker!

It started out innocently enough.
I began to think at parties now and then — to loosen up.
Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone — “to relax,” I told myself — but I knew it wasn’t true.
Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time. That was when things began to sour at home.

One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life.
She spent that night at her mother’s.

I began to think on the job.
I knew that thinking and employment don’t mix, but I couldn’t stop myself.
I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka.
I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, “What is it exactly we are doing here?”

One day the boss called me in. He said, “Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don’t stop thinking on the job, you’ll have to find another job.”

This gave me a lot to think about. I came home early after my conversation with the boss.
“Honey,” I confessed, “I’ve been thinking…”
“I know you’ve been thinking,” she said, “and I want a divorce!”
“But Honey, surely it’s not that serious.”
“It is serious,” she said, lower lip aquiver. “You think as much as college professors, and college professors don’t make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won’t have any money!”

“That’s a faulty syllogism,” I said impatiently.

She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.
“I’m going to the library,” I snarled as I stomped out the door.

I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche.
I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors…

They didn’t open. The library was closed.

To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night.
Leaning on the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye. “Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?” it asked.

You probably recognize that line.
It comes from the standard Thinker’s Anonymous poster.
Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.

I never miss a TA meeting.

At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was “Porky’s.” Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting.

I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home.

Life just seemed…easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.

I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.

Today, I registered to vote as a Republican…

(Author Anonymous)


26 responses to “A recovering thinker!

  1. viv66 November 5, 2009 at 3:01 pm

    I followed this from Twitter because I was alarmed you might be about the join the Territorial Army (TA) and am so relieved…
    My name is Viv and I am addicted to thinking!

  2. tobeme November 5, 2009 at 4:10 pm

    I love this! I have not seen this in a while, good stuff.

  3. Robert Longpré November 5, 2009 at 5:02 pm

    And I thought it was Transactional Analysis. My name is … okay, I want to respect my anonymity … well, truth is I forget who I am … I stopped thinking altogether and for that I am cured and don’t need no TA … why are we here?

  4. shiona November 5, 2009 at 5:40 pm

    Hm, this gave me a lot to think about. 🙂

  5. J November 5, 2009 at 6:11 pm

    Don’t think too much!! Talking from experience!! 🙂

  6. viv66 November 5, 2009 at 6:18 pm

    Can’t talk, thinking (adapted from Homer…Homer Simpson!)

  7. viv66 November 6, 2009 at 1:37 pm

    Could really do with something sweet and sugary; my friend is diabetic so theres nothing like that in the house…
    And I am COLD!!!!
    and on my own now.
    But I have a good book and I can huddle near a candle and keep away the frost bite….

  8. viv66 November 6, 2009 at 3:03 pm

    It’s a Tudor based murder mystery called Revelation.
    Sarah doesn’t feel the cold at all and the only heating is a ancinet gas fire that puts out as much heat as a candle. I’m frozen!!!!
    I must be getting old!!!!

  9. J November 6, 2009 at 3:52 pm

    Sounds really good! (The book that is!)
    Light some more candles!! Or perhaps become a “Spiritual Warrior” and experience some hot “Rays”!!

  10. Pingback: Hold me accountable please! « Control Your Destiny

  11. enreal November 6, 2009 at 5:32 pm

    This is great! I think I shall have to share…

  12. J November 6, 2009 at 8:46 pm

    Please do share..

  13. C.A.Margonper November 9, 2009 at 4:53 pm

    Fantastic post. It made me laugh. It also made me… think. 🙂


  14. Brynn November 9, 2009 at 7:33 pm

    I am therefore I think….
    Brilliant post, I guess it’s all about balance…

  15. viv66 November 9, 2009 at 11:32 pm

    I’m pink therefore I’m spam.

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