Journey of Life

the place formerly known as control your destiny

Hold me accountable please!

I am not just a Recovering Thinker! Unfortunately I am also a smoker and have been for the majority of my adult life. My family & friends have often tried and failed in persuading me stop this strange habit. Their failure became my failure too. Reading back A conversation with myself made me realise that smoking was perhaps another way for me to rebel against people and then when I re-read Word Salad I began to understand who I am actually punishing. Yep! That’ll be me!

I can no longer give you a valid argument for why I am smoking! I used to be able to come up with hundreds of good arguments but they have all vanished and I suspect that this is a good thing.

I have decided to give myself a birthday present this year, and this is it; On the 7th December 2009 (If not before) I will smoke my last cigarette.

The point of publishing it on here is what the title is all about. With your agreement I am asking you to hold me accountable for this.

To put things into perspective, I am experiencing an internal battle of whether or not to post this!! If you read this you know who won the battle!

Thank you in advance.

 

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11 responses to “Hold me accountable please!

  1. enreal November 6, 2009 at 5:24 pm

    I must say that I am blown away by your newly found energy… the past few posts are so alive and full of purpose, amazing!

    Your vision is so clear and your intentions are so pure, know this… the battle is won, wether or not you win… the fact that you have come upon the reasoning and understand the truth… that is the victory, everything else is politics. KNow that you are the sum of al parts, even the not so good parts, who cares? You are what is important… everything else is scenery…

    Love it 🙂 Great energy!

    • J November 6, 2009 at 8:38 pm

      Thank you enreal, in return I am blown away by your kindness. It makes such a huge difference. I think the initial battle was won by posting this and now I feel ready to return to being a non smoker!
      Love & hugs

  2. viv66 November 6, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    I agree with enreal!!
    So when we talk on the phone just to let you know I can tell when you are smoking….
    well done!

  3. J November 6, 2009 at 11:36 pm

    Doesn’t incense involve an element of smoke?? I do like incense though! Can I be allowed certain types of smoke???

  4. viv66 November 7, 2009 at 10:21 am

    Yes, Frankincense!
    I am burning some right now that Sarah bought me back from Istanbul!!! Wodnerful!

  5. Vanessa November 9, 2009 at 6:56 pm

    Incense is the LEGAL allowance for smoke, me thinks!!! Seriously, let yourself have that indulgence; it is what you don’t want to be putting into your lungs that counts…..

    You can do this J; keep the faith!!!!

  6. J November 10, 2009 at 8:09 pm

    Incense it is then!! For the first time in my smoking life I feel optimistic about it and the fear seems to have just vanished. It’s good to see you again Vanessa and thank you for the encouragement. It is actually a bigger help than you may think.
    hugs

  7. saffy February 18, 2010 at 9:27 pm

    Wonders if you’re still in recovery…

  8. J February 19, 2010 at 6:48 pm

    I am still in recovery but have experienced a few setbacks!!

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